Friday, September 26, 2008

2nd PLACE!

The 2nd Place Winner of our Post-Breaking Dawn Fanfiction Contest!

RENESMEE, by Georgia Allen!

Woot woot! Congrats Georgia!

Here's her story (leave reviews in the comments):

Chapter 1 My Jacob

POV: Renesmee Cullen

The ponderous rain drizzled on the hollow roof of my room. My eyes were closed, but I could still picture the exuberant breezes blowing throughout the forest. The musty smell of the wood floors tickled and taunted my nose. A low howl came from outside my window and I immediately recognized the raspy melody of Jacob.
My mind scrambled through all of the memories of Jake. The smiley, husky tone of his comforting chortles to the magnificence of his facial features made me fantasize. I also remembered his taunting words that sent my mother-Bella Cullen- lurching for his throat. I giggled silently at the antagonizing thought.
How was it possible that I was nearly thirteen and already irrevocably in love? Well I guess that it was quite involuntary to love such a mesmerizing creature. My mom explained that Jake had imprinted-meaning that he loved me as soon as he met my eyes. It didn’t seem weird that I lived with vampires and werewolves, but I did feel uncomfortable in the real world at school. Guys flirted with me every now and then, but I always blew them off, telling them that I already had a boyfriend that was sixteen-even though he was truly twenty nine. He never aged so it wasn’t a complete lie.
“Nessie?” came the musical voice of my father-Edward Cullen. He must have over heard my thoughts, so I shut them off immediately. I sat up then to search for my father through the darkness. It wasn’t too difficult to make out him because his ivory colored skin glowed in the doorway, like the pathway to heaven. He danced gracefully to my bedside and cradled me in his marbled arms.
Speaking of beautiful, I thought. My dad snorted quietly and then began to hum my lullaby. As always, my eyes began to droop and my breathing deepened. He also continued to twine my bronze colored ringlets in his chilled fingers. I drifted silently, but soon recalled my father laying me along my bed and quickly kissing me on the forehead.
Once again, I began to dream of Jacob Black.

It was Jacob who awoke me, “Nessie, beautiful. Wake up Little Suzie.” The gentle rasp of his voice sent my eyes shooting open. There, inches away from my face, was the copper colored skin and the amber eyes of Jake, “Hey Nessie. You wanna hang out in the valley with me today? It’s just going to be you and me today.” He reassured me. I nodded, dazzled and speechless of course.
The dry wind passing by tangled my hair and fluffed up my striped sundress. Suddenly I began to slide off Jake’s back, so I grasped even tighter to his russet fur. I lay my head along his tensed neck and listened to the musical beat of his galloping heart and his paws clamping deeper into the uneven earth. I could feel his strides lengthen and the power of his muscles tighten and flex.
A few moments later we returned to the valley of which the Volturi had once met and attempted to attack my beloved family and self. I cringed away from the frightening memory and Jacob shrugged his beastly wolf body into me for my comfort. Without even realizing, Jake slid me off the back of his torso and dashed into the forest.
I only gaped in the high grass after him. Wondering why he would leave me alone. I began to tremble, terrified once again by the frightening memories thirteen years ago. Wet bulky tears welded and shimmied down my cheeks. Desolation overwhelmed my insides. An electrifying breeze traveled through my body. Suddenly I heard a deafening snap of a limb and a boisterous shuffle through the leaves.
An obnoxious gasp slipped through my mouth and I unnecessarily whirled around, following the prowler’s steps. “Jake?” I whispered in an uneven voice. Jacob should have heard me so I began to writhe over his absence. Right then, warm muscular arms boiled along my waist. I let out an innocent yelp, but was only hushed.
“Shh, Nessie,” came the husky laughter of Jacob. I flushed a tomato red and swerved around to face Jake. He was bare-chested - his muscles perfectly outlined by his copper skin - and he only wore his torn sweat pants. His coffee colored eyes screeched with joy and his silky black hair mussed in the chilly breeze. I gasped self-consciously by his beauty. Jacob beamed lithely and offered his overly-sized hand to guide me.
Jacob hauled me to the middle of the valley and then lay gracefully in a high patch of wild flowers. I blew back my waist long ringlets away from my face and cuddled into Jacob’s side. He wrapped his lanky, muscular arm behind my head and then around my shoulders.
“You look so beautiful, Renesmee.” It was the first time that Jake had ever said my full name. I blushed in embarrassment and Jake chortled along. Not hesitating I whispered shyly, “You’re not so bad yourself.” Once again he bellowed in laughter and I only giggled.
When I looked back at him, surprisingly, he was only inches away from my face. “This is where Be- your parents had their first kiss,” I waited, not quite getting the point. Jake witnessed my confusion so went on, “I thought that maybe we could carry on that tradition.” Oh. Now I definitely got what he was saying. I became uncontrollably dizzy and off balance. Jake wanted to kiss me and I was totally unprepared. What would the outcomes be of kissing Jake? I’m sure that I could guess one.
But it was too late to protest. Jake’s lips blazed along mine and there was no way of stopping him or me. I kissed back, letting my protective love for him seek through. His wolf instincts suddenly kicked in and he began to squeeze the life out of me. Jake snarled under his breath and his lips struck pain to mine. I let out and involuntary squeal. Jake lurched away from me and bounded backwards, letting go of my waist.
“Oops. My bad,” we both chortled again, but still stayed about three feet apart. I finally took a graceful step forward, but in a flash I was in Jake’s arms. He gazed intensely at me and only grimaced, “I love you, Nessie.”
I looked away swiftly, trying to hide my rosy colored face, “I love you too, Jake.” Jake erupted in laughter and I turned to glare in confusion, “What?” I asked. Jacob looked three feet below him before his eyes reached my face. He whispered in my ear, “Your dad is going to rip my head off.” He chortled again and I only whimpered quietly.
For the rest of the afternoon, we both engaged about school and his patrolling duty last night. But, mostly I chafed about how my father would react to my memories of today. Jake repeated, “It’s going to be fine, Nessie. Hey, even if your dad does tear my head off, I can still grow one back in like twenty minutes.” He bellowed in enjoyment, but I only sobbed in terror and dread. He kissed me desperately again, giving my dad an even better reason to kill Jake. I sobbed again and he stopped to comfort me, “I’m not leaving you,” he promised and for some reason, I believed him.

Chapter 2 Frightening

When we passed Cullen territory, I could feel the anticipation and anxiety of the upcoming. I began to tremble, but since Jacob was still in his human form, he comforted me, “It’s going to be fine Ness. If you’re so worried, block your thoughts.”
Jake opened the French doors to the three storied mansion. I froze solid when I trudged inside. My father leaned against the frame of the door opening to the living room. His arms crossed and tapping along the sides of his flexed biceps. His ebony colored eyes burned an irritating hole inside of me. His vampire features made him look malevolent. I gasped aloud, while I witnessed Edward read my mind as my shield shattered in its place, allowing all of my memories of today flood out.
Jacob squeezed my hand tightly, but I only watched my father snarl abruptly, “YOU MONGREL!!!” He got down in a low, frightening crouch. Jacob shoved me quickly out of the way so that I fell to the ground out of the way of my thirsty father. My father’s dark eyes narrowed and he flexed his gorgeous muscles for when he bounded toward Jake. His beautiful threat left me petrified and frozen. Jake crouched down also, prepared for battle. They both looked so terrifying that I only gaped and watched. Jacob lurched also, prying for my father’s throat and my father aimed for Jake in a tackle-like position. Gruesome blood filled my mind from the memories of my mother dying; when I snapped her spine in half trying to release myself from her stomach. I would not allow another picture like that flow through my mind. I almost lost my entire beloved family before. I would not let something this ordinary and senseless to cause any kind of death in my family.
Finally, my body rejoined and my mind was replaced with bravery and love. I forced my muscles to lurch me upwards and in between Jake and my father. My vampire instincts shoved in between my two loved ones. My father halted in mid flight and his face fell from anger to pain, “Move. Right. Now. Nessie,” the demand in his words only made me twitch. I took three quick wheezy breaths and replied, “No. This is unbelievable! You guys are going to fight and kill each other over a kiss? I don’t believe this! Why?”
My father glared down at me, his pain causing tears to weld in my eyes. His jaw tightened and his eyes turned into a cloudy gray. In one blink of an eye, he had whirled around and dashed out of the room. Jake grasped my shoulders and hugged me comfortly, “I’ll go talk to him tomorrow, baby. No worries. Don’t ever do that again, Ness,” he demanded and then kissed me on the forehead, “Sleep, Nessie. I’ll be watching over you tonight.”
With that he darted into the forest howling for Seth, I guessed. And a moment later of sobbing, my mother danced through the doorway and onto the patio, where I sat. She scooped me into her arms, effortlessly, “Oh Renesmee. Sweetie, come here.” She kissed my cheek and without another word she sprinted, with me in her arms, at an incredulous speed.
Seconds later I was in my bedroom and halfheartedly asleep. I began to sob uncontrollable again. I always thought of my father as a sweet, understanding angel. But yet again, he was a vampire and had no control over his instincts. There was no excuse for his behavior over my love for Jake though. As I battled with myself my mother lay me along my bed and tucked my in, reassuring me, “Renesmee, you did nothing wrong. Sweetie, sleep,” her musical voice settled my emotions briefly and when she left, I was sobbing once again.
The memories of my dad lurching towards Jacob to kill him made me shiver. And the memories of Jake threatening my father’s life confused me and darkened my mood even more.
“Nessie?” came the low stoned voice of my father. He stood in the doorway, no longer irritated, and looked almost astounded and embarrassed. Good, I thought. Edward chuckled once and then prowled over to my bedside, “I do deserve that don’t I?” He waited in the darkness and began to trickle his stone cold fingers through my hair, “Listen, I was horrifying and monstrous. I’ m so disappointed in my behavior and reactions. I’m so sorry, Renesmee. I was wrong. Just caught me off guard, sweetie.”
“You should have known that it was coming,” I snapped.
My father shook his head in embarrassment again and sighed, “Alice did have a vision. I didn’t think that it would come so soon. Please forgive me, Nessie.”
I whirled around and hurdled into my father’s arms. He closed the distance and hugged me into him. He was so loving and gentle. Every time I hugged him I felt so feeble and breakable, when really I was a million times stronger than any other girl. My father kissed my hair and whispered, “I love you,” in my ear. I pecked him on his cool cheek and squealed, “I love you too.” He twirled my ringlets in his fingers again and sighed, “I still feel horrible, Ness. I’m so, very remorseful.” He grimaced and promised, “You and Jake can have your time tomorrow and I swear to you that I will attempt to not listen.” We both bellowed in laughter and he gently brushed my flushing face with his clammy fingers. When he left for me to sleep, I lurched out of my bed and to the window. I searched throughout the darkness before I found what I was looking for. Jacob grinned his wooly smile and howled in enjoyment. I giggled silently and finally managed to fall into a deep sleep.

Chapter 3 Forever Ending

Aunt Rose, Alice, Uncle Em, Jasper, my parents and grandparents, Jake and I all
sat in the living room, chatting and bellowing in laughter. Jacob lay his arm around my
shoulders and brushed my hair every now and then. Every one seemed to be in a joyful
Somehow, a few days ago, I stopped aging. I used to grow at an incredulous speed
but I hadn’t grown an inch in five days. I already looked like a seventeen year old, so I
would blend in easily with my parents and boyfriend in school. Carlisle explained to me
that I would have to begin hunting lessons soon, before I became too thirsty.
My father suddenly bounded upwards, “Jake may I speak with you?” Jacob
bowed his head down in embarrassment. Hesitantly, he followed my father into the
kitchen. I began to fret and tremble, remembering last week when my two loved ones
killed each other. Jasper noticed my wariness and sat me in his lap. For minutes, I
thanked God for his “magical powers.”
“Don’t worry Nessie. They’re just talking,” Jasper reassured me. I grasped his
face with one of my hands and showed him my memories of their last “talk.” Jasper
chuckled darkly and glared at me to calm my worries.
Before I knew it, I was on the ground again and Jasper was already across the
room. Jake and my father were stalking in the room, side by side with grins on either
of their faces. Jake came over to my side, “Come with me for a moment.” Before we
walked out of the room, I overheard my mother squeal in excitement and the rest of
my family whisper and many “awes” and “wows” went around the hushed room.
Jacob guided me outside and finally stopped at the edge of the forest, so that my
father couldn’t listen, I guessed. He whirled around to face me, a wide, beautiful gleam
on his face. Jake played with something glistening between his hands. “I’ve been waiting
for this day to come for a long while, Nessie,” he took two deep breaths and began again,
“I love you, Ness. I’ve loved you since the day you were born…..Renesmee Cullen, will
you marry me?”
Once again, shock and panic flew through me, like an electric wire. I couldn’t
breathe and I couldn’t think. Jacob waited patiently, trickling his fingers up and down my
arms. I closed my eyes and tears welded in my eyes, again, “Nessie?” he asked quietly,
bringing me back to reality. His voice was hoarse and sincere.
“Yes!” I exclaimed and jumped into his arms, full of joy and love. Jake crushed
me against his chest and we both chortled loudly. When he let me go he kissed me with
passion. After a moment of kissing, I heard a low clear – of - a - throat from behind. We
both bounded away from each other and looked back at our family. Every spouse, hand –
in-hand, smiling and bellowing in laughter.
“Wow,” Alice breathed in amazement. We all turned our heads toward the sunset.
The sky was a deep crimson with orange and pink smudges. The luminous sun dangled
just above the fuzzy mountains. The valley glowed a bright orange and purple. “’So
beautiful,” I sighed. Jacob grasped my hand and turned to face me, “Yes you are,” he
replied and I turned a tomato red. Jake then moved his hands swiftly to my face and
kissed me.
That’s when I began the most wonderful forever that any person could ask for –
with my beloved family by my side. Love, was all I thought.

PS: the 3rd place winner will be announced next week!
PPS: prizes should be ready by next week also!
PPPS: PLEASE leave reviews. The author would really appreciate it, I'm sure.

1 comment:

  1. Georgia, this is awesome. I love that they got engaged at the end. I actually squealed out loud when I read that part! (Of course, they are a little young to get married.) You are incredible. Keep writing!!!
    - Keri


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